Have you ever wondered about the health of your relationship? Do you wish you knew how to tell if your relationship was in trouble? If so, this article is for you. This article will discuss ways to tell if your relationship is in trouble and if you should end it.
Most couples have rough patches, many are oblivious to the signs pointing to trouble in the relationship. If you are having a rough time in your relationship and cant decide if it’s over, her are some telltale signs that you may need to move on.
1 Your in an abusive relationship. Either mental, emotional, or physical, abuse should not be tolerated, ever.
2 You don’t want to spend time with your partner and often find yourself looking for excuses to avoid spending time with one another.
3 You find yourself reminiscing about the past and emotion you used to feel. The intensity of your emotions will dissipate some, once you have past the “honeymoon” stage. This means that you no longer have the feelings toward your partner that you used to. If you look deep and you are honest with yourself, you will know when the love is gone.
4 You have to compromise your beliefs, values, and happiness in order to make your partner happy or to avoid disputes with them.
5 You no longer find your partner attractive or you have changed your appearance drastically hoping to be attractive to your partner.
6 You are not “allowed” to have close friends or close relationships with your family. Your partner may be possessive and get jealous when you try to pursue any relationship besides the one you have with them.
7 You are engaging in repetitive fights that serve no purpose.
8 You no longer want your partner to kiss you. You may try to avoid physical contact all together.
9 You look forward to the times you are apart (at work etc.) and dread the times when you are together.
10 You don’t want to try to find a solution for the problem, you just don’t care anymore.
11 Every little thing that they do, becomes a huge source of irritation and annoyance for you. Even the little insignificant things drive you crazy.
12 You don’t communicate except when you absolutely have to.
13 You can no longer visualize yourself spending the rest of you life with your partner. You can only see spending the rest of your life without them.
14 You don’t have the same long term goals, do you want to be married and they only want to live together?
Deciding to end a relationship should be taken very seriously. It should not be done on a whim, ending a relationship should be the result only after you have tried everything you can to save it. It also takes a lot of thought. The best way to decide if you should end the relationship is by making a list with two columns. The first side should list everything that is positive about your relationship. On the second side, list everything that is negative. Be completely honest when making these lists. It usually helps someone make a decision objectively when you see the two lists next to each other and can see which is longer. Most importantly, a relationship should bring you joy and fulfill your needs. Relationships are suppose to add to the quality of your life, not take away from it. If you have used all the resources available and are still unhappy in your relationship, it is possible that you should end it. When ending a relationship, be gentle, remember how badly you could hurt your partner. Don’t be immature or degrading to your partner. Simply explain the situation calmly and then walk away. Above all things, do not fall into the “I will change” trap.
All relationships have their ups and downs. When you begin thinking about ending your relationship, you have a lot of factors to consider. This article discussed some of those factors. Break ups are never easy but if you are unhappy in your relationship, you will feel much better when it’s over.
1 Steve Pavlina – How to decide when to end a long term relationship
2 Christina Steinorth -Signs that its time to end a relationship