Every person who has ever been in a relationship that has lasted longer than a week knows that any relationship needs some work to be maintained for any lengthy amount of time. Even though you have been together for what seems like all of eternity, you still need to put in a little effort to remind you and your spouse of the reasons that you got together and got married. If either of you have forgotten that, you need to put in some more effort. You both may be busy with the kids and work, but at some point you will be retired and the kids will be moved out and living their own lives, so just a little effort can ensure that your marriage makes it to that point and you both are still happy.
One thing that you can do to maintain a strong marriage is to do little things for your spouse to let them know that you are thinking about them. If your spouse usually does the grocery shopping, but they have been swamped at work and they may have to squeeze a grocery run in during their lunch hour or after working a twelve hour workday, run out and buy the essentials so that they can come straight home from work and relax a little, or better yet, go to the grocery store and make dinner too. That will take a lot of stress off of their shoulders and they will be very grateful for it. If they get home after the kids are in bed, set up a candlelit dinner for them when they get home-even if you are only cooking macaroni and cheese or something simple like that. They may laugh at you for making a big deal out of such a simple meal, but they will appreciate the effort and you can even share a laugh or two over it. Simple things like that can show your spouse that you care about them and you are trying to make their lives a little easier when they are stretched too thin.
Another thing that you can do to maintain a strong marriage is to always take time out to talk to each other and engage in an adult conversation. Even if you only have time for ten or fifteen minutes to talk about what you did at work that day, it will help both of you stay connected to each other, even if it is only in a small way. Instead of turning on the television when you go to bed, lay in bed and talk to each other for a little while. Who knows, maybe it will lead to other ways of bonding. If you have to attend a sports game for one of the kids, step away for a minute to take a walk together or go to the concession stand to get something to eat or drink. You could even hold hands on the way , just like you did when you were dating.
Another important part of maintaining a strong marriage is to communicate with each other. Talk over those big items that you are going to buy to get your spouse’s input, even if you know they will not object. That will let them know that their opinion is important to you, and you may even get a perspective that you did not consider before talking to them. That works both ways too, if they are buying a big item and you think they should reconsider, let them know that. Don’t tell them that they are wrong or that their decision is dumb, just let them know that you will support them but you have another opinion that they should at least consider.
These small things may seem simple, but they can help to keep a married couple connected to each other. If you just go through each day just like the last, before you know it you roll over one morning and struggle to remember why you married the person in bed with you. Maintaining a strong marriage doesn’t have to be hard, but it does take some work on both parts. Just a little effort each day can go a long way and help keep you and your spouse together and happy.