The short list for possible Obama nominations as appointees to the vacant seat on the Supreme Court has surfaced. Many experts are surprised at who is on the list. Here is the short list and the candidate’s qualifications:
Jerry Brown, one time democratic governor of the State of California and more recently major of Oakland. The proximity of Oakland to Berkley makes Brown a candidate in the running.
Mike Tyson, A winner and a fighter, He bit off someone’s ear once which definitely qualifies him. Tyson has been in prison more than once so he has ample experience with the US justice system. If Tyson can’t whip up the existing Supreme Court justices and get them to vote according the the administration’s goals for the court no one can except for the next candidate on the list…
Ricihard Simmons: Simmons is a candidate that will allow Oprah to direct her audience attention to the workings of the court. Simmons might even get a few of the more seasoned conservative judges to quit because they might not go along with a daily exercises routine. Justice must be physically fit not just flabby under black robes.
Britney Spears, She is a woman and the supreme court only has one woman who may also be the next to retire from the court. Spears has extensive experience with the US justice system. Britney could bring to the Supreme Court a Southern California Attitude that is missing. Why waste time with justices from the 9th circuit court of appeals when Britney is available and younger. The younger the new justices the longer they are likely to last on the bench.
Ex Illinois Governor Blagojavich, He has name recognition. Obama probably still owes him political favors which is customary in Chicago. Blagojavich has novel ideas about legal justice and like many other Obama appointees he has experience breaking the law. How can the country start changing the laws without the help of law breakers? Some one who thinks out side the box who is not yet in jail–a major plus for Blagojavich.
John Lennon, Although he is dead and not a US citizen, Lennon had the right idea about how the world should be according to songs he wrote. John Lennon could be the first IPod on the bench with a play list of songs that promote social justice and world peace. A card board standee in a black robe of Lennon with his lunnette purple glasses and a black robe would solve most of the Court’s problems because his vote on cases could always be based on the content of his songs as they apply to the US Constitution. If the Congress objects to the nomination of a dead non citizen then a Portable computer with wifi could be substituted for Lennon with Lennon as a remote controlled avatar operated by Acorn employees.
David Letterman, He is alive and some people think he is funny but that is a good thing for a court that often acts too seriously. Letterman would look good in a black robe. He can analyze complex issues and always come down to core liberal principles that would make him the center figure on the Supreme Court.
Bill Clinton, An Ex-president with a law degree. Bill knows what is wrong with the courts. He has not had a job recently with sufficient access to interns and thus might be interested in the Job. Hilary was promised more than just the secretary of state if she would drop out of the race and this could be the cherry on top of the whipped cream?
President Obama promised “Change”. To change the US supreme court takes a nominee like one of these on the short list.