A powerful line that Darth Vader uttered to Luke Skywalker in The Empire Strikes back. This line sadly tells about our civilization’s history. This line was also a harsh lesson for me to learn about hatred and its devastating affects it has. This is what happened to me and were my hatred had costed me and another person whose reputation I single handedly destroyed not once but twice.
Before when I got to 9th grade I had a hatred for people who liked the same sex. It was like a blinding hatred I had for no reason at all. After a few months went by in 9th grade, I had called out faggot to someone in my class. After the verbal abuse was over it spread like a wildfire. Then the person’s reputation took a massive hit days after. In which he responded later by getting even and to bring my reputation down. He was quite successful, plus I was giving him the ammunition since I was high all the time. The thing I found out what he did made me angry. He gotten my screen name and somehow was monitoring my conversations with people. Before I found out, I was wondering why everything I said people found out about. This was causing more conflict and drama surrounding me like a rain cloud. I didn’t take this well so I confronted him and warned him about it. Then somehow I found out he was talking behind my back after that. I decided on the last day of school that I was going to beat him up. Well it was the last day and I fought him and the rest is a blur. I just know he got the worst of it at that time. Later as I was getting my yearbook I was arrested. His family pressed charges on me for aggravated assault.
I went to jail were they put me in a miserable place for youngsters called the sweat box. We were only given nasty cheese sandwiches and we had to buy our own water. I was in there for the longest seven hours of my life and it was getting crowded. Finally I got out but it wasn’t over yet. I had to go to court hearings. Then I was face to face with three people who were in charge of my punishment and my record. They told me my punishment was that I had to go for anger management, do community service, read selected books to write reports on, and look up my career interest. My first day of community service I started to realize my wrongdoing. It wasn’t easy I had to clean and organize the police station in the blazing heat. This went on for weeks and it kept getting worser. The heat was so intense I almost collapsed multiple times from heat exhaustion. I kept thinking that I was dying that this is what death must feel like. It was horrible but somehow I managed to get through. After a few months of an intense and tiring workout my record was finally expunged. It wasn’t over yet the worst was yet to come.
My efforts to get a clean record were very time consuming so I had little time to spend with anybody. My father died a few months later after my record was clean. His death made me realize if I wasn’t starting trouble I would of been able to spend the summer with him. Then I began later after his death thinking about what I did to the person whose life I changed for the worst. I kept thinking that what if what I did would of hurt his life and hurt the people around him who care for him. All these thoughts kept ripping apart my conscious day in and day out. I kept feeling guiltier and guiltier by the minute. I decided to apologize to him face to face. This wasn’t easy because I was the one who started this mess. Well I did it and he accepted it and my conscious was cleared enabling me to move on.
I hope that the man I apologized to do will do great in his life. I also hope that someday there would be classes around the world teaching about hatred and what it does. To me hatred is more powerful then any weapon of mass destruction around the world. It practically is the weapon of mass destruction. I hope we can teach anyone of age about how dangerous it can be. It’s the cause of war, destruction, and loss of life. Hate is the cause of racism, religion disputes, homophobia, sexism, genocide, slavery, and ageism. People pay a terrible price at the hands of hatred. Both the hated and hater suffer from the after affects. The price I paid as the hater was extreme guilt for what I did and lossed time with my dad. The person who was the hated I know he had to put up alot of insults during his tenure there at high school. I bet he had alot of bad feelings inside as well. From this tremendous incident I now see everyone around the globe as red. Were all red inside if we cut ourselves. We all have red body parts that are red like a heart or kidney. We all have feelings and a brain. If we as a civilization fail to see each other as the same or red then we’ll never ever live in peace and harmony.