Unfortunately, there are times in our lives when we must encounter uncomfortable, messy, and unpleasant situations. Among these experiences is dealing with a friend that has decided to cheat on his or her partner.
Physical attraction is generally the initial step in most relationships. Whether we notice pretty eyes, beautiful teeth, or round rears, we notice these things immediately upon meeting someone new. While finding an individual physically attractive is perfectly normal human behavior, this is merely the beginning on a long process in which infatuation soon develops.
So your best bud mentioned the hot new guy at the office – normal conversation, right? Has she spoken about him again since first bringing it up? When the infatuation phase begins, it is nearly impossible to stop talking about your new object of desire. If you find your friend constantly babbling on and on about the new office hottie, chances are that she has more than the normal amount of physical attraction towards him.
Emotionally and mentally, we process the idea of cheating for quite some time before it usually occurs. Has your friend lost interest in her partner recently? Is she feeling neglected or bored with her home life? If so, she may already be finding herself toying with the idea of making a move of her new object of affection.
The warning signs are generally pretty clear. Exactly how do you point these behaviors out to your friend? The key to beginning this conversation is to make it very obvious that you are not passing judgment. Ask her what specific problems she is having at home, what she feels is missing from her current relationship, and make suggestions on how she can improve these things rather than deciding to cheat. For example, your friend is upset because her partner is working late every day. Suggest a surprise breakfast for her partner, a nice way for them to bond in a comfortable environment at a time when both are available.
Above all else, be as supportive as possible – even if your friend is in the wrong. Let her know your feelings on the situation without taking on a confrontational tone. Perhaps she is simply depressed or lonely and needs to vent about her partner’s recent annoying behaviors. She may even be seeking your approval for her going through with the plans to cheat. It is important to stay as neutral and objective as possible in order to provide any help whatsoever. Be honest while being a good friend.